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Ol’ Muddah Ratbat frem parish
sly like de mongoose an smattah den man!
Mek plenty money frem straw goods and tips
down at de market where moor dem gran ships.
Toss out big hook fe tourist tah swallah;
snatch in de Whitefish, catch yankee dollah.
Sell plenty tings, say mek by Jamaicans;
trut be, she wares was got frem de Hatiens.
“Buy someting massa , hep Muddah’s poor lot;
me doan hab no roof an ongly one pot.”
“Pickney dem stravin’, see how dem mauga;
beg yah buy someting; me give yah a *braughtah.”
Mistah him sorry fe muddah’s poor life;
pull out fat wallet an pass tah him wife.
Spen plenty money, guilt fe tah bury;
tek up dem spendins, six parcels dem carry.
Pack up she wares wen de clock han strike four;
grab up de pickney, pass tru de banque door.
Lodge mos de money, out back door she side;
unlock she big cyar, push pickney inside.
Drive tah she sistah an slip she a ten;
promise fe nex day rent pickney again.
Lean back pon de seat an light up a fag;
laugh fe de trickery, drive home in she jag!
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*a little something extra…like a baker’s dozen in the U.S.A.